


It's You And Me (Among The Stars)

by missingnowrites



Category: Critical Role (Web Series), Stargate SG-1
Genre: (but in a funny way not angsty), Adventure, Communication, Crossover, Cultural Differences, Fluff, Gen, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:06:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23454502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missingnowrites/pseuds/missingnowrites
Summary: When Grog discovers an ancient artefact, he and Pike end up in a dimension called "Earth".Stargate Command aren't really sure what to make of the giant and tiny aliens.
Relationships: Grog Strongjaw & Pike Trickfoot
Comments: 25
Kudos: 95





	It's You And Me (Among The Stars)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CaptainKaysno](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainKaysno/gifts).



> For the lovely Kays <3 She asked me to write a Critical Role C1/Stargate SG-1 crossover in which Pike and Grog meet SG-1 :D

“It was right… over… here…”

Grog stepped over the jagged rocks of the ruin with ease, while Pike scrambled after him. Noticing her struggle, he reached back and pulled her up onto a flat piece of stone. Pike figured it used to be part of the ground floor, but whatever had ruined the building had ripped up the floor, too. Looking around, she nearly stumbled into Grog when he abruptly stopped in his tracks.

“What is it, Grog?”

“There,” he replied, waving his hand towards the pedestal in front of him. “That’s an ar- atem- atty-thingie, right?”

On a platform that had stayed mostly intact stood something resembling a very round archway. Runes were chiseled along the arch, but none that Pike had ever encountered. Seven v-shaped holes were cut into the stone at such regular intervals it had to be deliberate. The stairs up had crumbled with time and weather. Flowering vines climbed over and through the rubble and around the arch, lending the whole scene a serene air.

“Oh Grog,” Pike breathed, grabbing her best friend’s hand and squeezing. “It’s beautiful!”

“It’s gotta be a portal, right? Like the ones Keyleth makes whenever we travel?” Grog was brimming with excitement, jumping in place. “Where do you think it leads?”

“I don’t know, Grog.” Pike shook her head, smiling. “It’s nothing like I’ve ever seen.”

They approached the platform with different levels of caution, Grog bounding ahead and ducking through the archway. Pike lingered on the platform, hand reaching out to brush the vines away. Moss had overgrown most of the runes, and as Pike gently pulled it off, she realized that each rune had its own indented space in the arch.

“I wonder if Percy would recognize these,” she murmured to herself, hands tracing the rune. Maybe she should take notes to take to Whitestone later this week?

Suddenly the rune started glowing under her gloved fingers, an icy blue light filling both it and the v-shaped holes. Pike flinched, taking a startled step back. “What the...?”

“Look, Pike!” Grog hollered from the other side, and Pike hopped off the platform, giving the arch a wary look. Better not stay close if it was active. Who knew what would set it off, and what the runes were meant to do? “I think I found the key!”

When Pike came closer, she could see Grog standing in front of a short stone pillar, reaching maybe his mid-thigh. At first she thought it was a casualty of the destruction around them, broken in half, but as she stepped up next to Grog she could see similar runes carved into the surface. They, too, were lit up in a blue so bright it seemed almost white.

“What did you do?” she asked curiously, standing on the tips of her toes to see the top of the pillar.

“Nothing!” Grog protested immediately, holding up his hands with a feigned look of innocence. “I just… stood here! Yeah! Totally didn’t wave my hands over this pillar or, or touch anything. At all.”

“Mhm,” Pike hummed, sounding skeptical. She craned her head to see that the runes seemed to be inscribed on flat squares, with thin lines separating them from the pillar. It was easy to overlook, between all the cracks running through the surface, but she knew what she was looking for now. “Which one did you push?”

Grog promptly pointed to a rune in the middle.

It didn’t look like it sat any deeper in its square than any of the others. Pike grabbed the edge of the pillar, heaving herself up to have a closer look, but her hand slipped on something slimy and she overbalanced. With a cry, she crash face first into the runes.

Hands caught her sides and lifted her up. Pike shot Grog a quick smile in gratitude, but her attention was quickly captured by the archway. It spun faster now, the triangles snapping into place one after the other, until the last one clicked and then-- a moment of stillness before a blue, liquidy substance burst out of the archway. It stretched several feet, and Grog dropped Pike to step in front of her, axe at the ready. Pike scrambled for her mace, watching as the substance returned into the archway and… settled.

For a long moment, nothing happened.

Slowly, carefully, Pike peeked around Grog. The liquid flickered in various shades of blue, ripples running across the surface, but it seemed mostly stationary now. Pike and Grog exchanged a long look, then started inching closer. As they stepped within range of the previous attack, they paused, but the liquid didn’t react to their presence. Not when they only stood a couple feet in front of it either.

“Can I touch it, can I touch it, please Pike, can I touch it?” Grog asked, jumping excitedly from one leg to the other.

“I don’t know, Grog,” Pike murmured, watching the ripples, mesmerized. Tearing her eyes away, she glanced up at her friend. “We don’t know what it does.”

Nodding his head like an overeager puppy, Grog poked the liquid with his axe instead.

Pike expected the fluid to move away or perhaps have a bubble like skin to resist the poke, or maybe even lash out to attack them. She had a spell of protection ready on her lips, but none of those things happened: instead, the tip of Grog’s axe vanished. With a yelp, Grog pulled it back out. It appeared untouched.

“The fuck,” he muttered, sticking the axe back in and pulling it back out. Pike ducked her head around the archway, but it wasn’t sticking out the other side.

“I think you were right,” Pike offered, smiling up at Grog.

“I was?” he asked, a look of confusion on his face. Then he broke out into a bright smile. “I mean, of course I’m right! I’m always right! Uh… what was I right about again?”

Giggling, Pike shook her head. “It’s some sort of portal! Like the one Keyleth made when we travelled to the City of Brass.”

“Oh.” Grog cocked his head. “So, uh. Where does it lead?”

“I don’t know, but we can find out!” Pike grinned up at him. Then hesitation snuck across her face. “Uh, but maybe we should throw something in first? To, you know, test it?”

Grog shrugged. “Okay.” And then he chucked his axe into the portal, chain of returning attached. Tugging on it, the axe didn’t return however. Grog broke out into a broad grin. “I think I hit something!”

“That works,” Pike laughed. “Let’s follow it and find out!”

* * *

Sam was in the lab, puzzling over a new piece of Goa’uld tech her team managed to recover on their latest mission, when the alarm started blaring. Daniel fell silent mid-sentence, head snapping up to meet Sam’s eyes.

“Unauthorized gate activation. Iris closing. All military personnel stand by.”

The shrill alarm continued on in the background while the message repeated. Sam dropped everything onto the table and was out of the door before she could think about it, running on instinct. Daniel was close behind her.

“I thought the Goa’uld are busy fighting each other right now,” Daniel shouted over the sirens as they hurried down the halls, passing other personnel hurrying to their positions. The scientists were supposed to barricade in the labs, but Daniel had been part of SG-1 for too long to bother.

“They might’ve come to an agreement,” Sam suggested, though the thought made her grimace. “Or maybe it’s the Tok’Ra?”

“But why wouldn’t they signal us first?”

“Iris has been compromised,” the speaker announced before Sam could reply, and they came to a shocked stop. The voice sounded frantic as it continued, “I repeat, Iris has been compromised. All military personnel to gate room ASAP.”

Sam and Daniel locked eyes, and then they were running.

The command center was bustling with techs checking the consoles, General Hammond demanding updates, while the first guard had surrounded the open gate. The iris was half-closed, leaving a hole several feet wide in the middle. What stopped the mechanism from working was immediately apparent: a blood-red axe stuck in the metal, splitting the panels apart and jamming the lock into this half-between state of not quite open and not quite closed.

“I want answers!” General Hammond was yelling as they entered. Teal’c was standing towards the end of the room, and Daniel made a beeline for him, Sam hot on his heels.

“What’s going on?” he murmured, pulling off his glasses to clean them on his shirt.

“Sir, the source coordinates aren’t in our databanks!” one of the scientists called out, and everything but the alarm siren quieted for one shocked moment.

“How can that be?” Sam asked, and the room broke back out into frantic activity. The door opened again to reveal Colonel O’Neill, offering the general a quick salut, before sidling over to his team.

“What’s going on?” he asked, not bothering to keep the question quiet.

“We don’t know yet, sir,” Sam reported, while Daniel shrugged. Jack glanced towards Teal’c next, who arched a brow at him.

“Indeed,” he agreed.

Jack opened his mouth, but before he could continue to question them, silence fell over the room. In the gate room, a small head poked through the open hole. A young girl with white-blonde hair blinked wide eyes at the gun-wielding soldiers, before wriggling around until she plopped over the iris, landing on her butt. She was wearing metal armour like you might see at a ren-faire.

“That’s a child,” Jack blurted out, and General Hammond was already pressing the communication button.

“Stand down, soldiers,” he ordered, and the soldiers lowered their guns just as a massive hand reached out and grabbed the shaft of the axe. Instinctively, they jerked their guns back up.

The child scrambled up from the floor and, ignoring the guns aimed at her, turned around towards the gate. A giant man poked his head out, black tattoos and black beard covering his face. His skin was a pale grey, and he had broader shoulders than Teal’c. Pulling the axe out, he shoved those shoulders into the hole the iris left. But now that the obstacle was removed, it was trying to close again. However, as the man pressed his hands to either side, the iris stuttered before reversing direction, slowly being pushed open.

Everyone stared, jaws agape, as inch by inch the iris opened wider.

Sam was the first to find her tongue. Turning to the general, she sputtered, “Sir! At the level of force that man is exerting, it’s likely that he will break the iris! Especially since it’s already been damaged.”

General Hammond closed his eyes, pinched the bridge of his nose, and ordered in a resigned tone, “Open the iris.”

“Yes, sir!” one of the techs exclaimed, and a moment later the iris slowly retracted with an unhealthy grinding noise.

The man who stepped out of the gate was easily over 8 feet tall, having to duck his head to fit through. The rest of his skin was just as pale grey as his face, and clearly not stage makeup. He hefted the axe over his shoulder with ease, turning to his smaller companion to say something before both of them turned to face the soldiers.

“Judging by their clothes, the man could be from anywhere from the paleolithic era to a middle-ages equivalent,” Daniel offered, pushing his glasses up his nose. “But the girl’s armour and those weapons are made out of metal, though I’d have to take a closer look to be certain, I’d say that pushes them more towards a medieval society.”

General Hammond sighed and nodded to indicate he was listening. “Anything else?”

Sam hesitated, but… “That man is strong.” Everyone looked at her in exasperation, and Sam cleared her throat. “I mean, elite fighters’ level of strength. There’s not many humans on Earth who could pull off that sort of feat. Some powerlifters, maybe… and we can’t be sure he’s human. Sir.”

“Right,” Jack said after the silence got awkward, clapping his hands. “Let’s see what they want, then.”

General Hammond sighed again, but waved them to go on.

* * *

Grog gave the soldiers a dignified nod, telling each of them, “Bidet.”

Pike couldn’t quite bite back her grin, but her eyes were wary as she gripped her shield tightly. The soldiers didn’t respond to Grog at all, their fingers on their weapons twitching as they stepped closer.

“Those look like guns,” she whispered to Grog, who stopped in his greetings to turn to her.

“Like Percy’s?” he asked, eyeing the black rods. They did look different from Bad News, or even Rippley’s version of the pistols, but the resemblance was there. And they both knew how much damage Percy could do.

“Yeah.”

A door opened with a hiss, and the soldiers parted to let four people through. They walked up to Grog and Pike, stopping a couple feet away. One of them, a man with short brown hair and glasses that also reminded her of Percy’s, gave them a nod.

“Bidet.”

Grog broke out into a delighted grin. “Bidet!”

“Indeed,” the dark skinned human flanking the other greeter murmured.

Grog frowned, leaning down to whisper loudly to Pike, “Is that what you should normally answer?”

“I think it is here, Grog,” Pike whispered back. Grog grinned, bouncing in place.

“Okay!"

The brown-haired human shot his companion a friend before turning to them with a smile. "Welcome to Earth. I am Doctor Daniel Jackson, and this is my team. Colonel Jack O’Neill," he pointed at the man standing half in front of him. “Major Samantha Carter,” was a woman with short, blonde hair next to him, “and Teal’c.”

The dark skinned human inclined his head.

“Earth?” Pike startled, glancing around. It didn’t look like the caves she expected from Keyleth’s stories of the Earth Elemental Plane. And the portal they found hadn’t been anywhere near Terrah, or looked all that natural. “We should tell Keyleth once we’re back,” she murmured.

“Do you think they’re Ashari?” Grog stage whispered, probably louder than he intended.

Pike scrunched up her nose and shook her head. “They don’t really dress like it.”

“Ashari?” Daniel inquired, which reinforced Pike’s impression.

“Druids who protect the portals to other planes,” she explained with a smile.

“I guess you could call us Ashari then,” Jack drawled. “We basically do that, but for our ‘plane’ here.”

He made a weird gesture with his hands as he said ‘plane’, moving the pointer and middle fingers of both hands up and down twice.

The woman, Samantha, cleared her throat. “What are your names? If we may ask.”

“Oh!” Pike blinked. She hadn’t realized they skipped over their own introduction. How rude! “I’m Pike Trickfoot, and this is my friend, Grog.”

“Bidet,” Grog repeated for the umpteenth time, chest puffing out. “Grog Strongjaw, Grand Poobah de Doink of All of This and That.”

An awkward silence descended upon them as the humans exchanged looks.

“That sounds like, um, like an impressive title,” Daniel finally ventured.

“Indeed,” Grog agreed, glancing at Teal’c to see if he used the phrase correctly. The dark-skinned human just blinked back at him, unfazed.

“Maybe we should move this to one of the meeting rooms?” Samantha suggested, giving Pike and Grog a friendly smile. “We’re kinda blocking the room here.”

“Oh! Sorry,” Pike apologized immediately, returning her smile. “Sure.”

“Lead the way,” Grog said in his most royally dignified tone. Pike suppressed a giggle.

All in all, this was shaping up to be a fun adventure. She couldn’t wait to tell Scanlan and the kids!

**Author's Note:**

> No promises, but I *do* have a couple ideas of what else could happen xD
> 
> (like SG-1 having trouble with the concept of deities that actively intervene in mortal affairs but aren't Goa'uld or other advanced aliens :P)


End file.
